Breaking down the impacts of Social Media on your relationships.
Let’s be real - social media isn’t going anywhere. In 2025, it’s practically a second language. We wake up and scroll, connect through DMs, share life updates on stories, and use it to escape after a long day.
But somewhere in between liking memes and sending TikToks to our partner, we’ve also started to feel… disconnected. Misunderstood. Maybe even a bit insecure.
If you’ve ever felt that weird tension between your digital world and your real-life relationships—you’re not alone. Social media can both bring us closer and drive us further apart. The key is figuring out how to use it with intention.
Let’s break it down.
The Comparison Trap: “Why don’t we look like that?”
You’re lying on the couch in your hoodie, your partner’s half-asleep with chips on their shirt, and suddenly your feed hits you with #CoupleGoals
She’s glowing. He’s holding her hand. The sunset is perfect. And just like that, you start to question:
Why don’t we do stuff like that?
Should we be going on more dates?
Are we even that happy?
What’s really happening? You’re comparing your behind-the-scenes to someone else’s highlight reel. And it’s not a fair fight. So here’s what you can do:
Reframe your thoughts: When you catch yourself comparing, pause and remind yourself: This is one moment. I don’t know the full story.
Create your own highlights (offline): Plan moments that matter to you, not what looks good on Instagram. A slow Sunday breakfast might not be “post-worthy,” but it could be exactly what your relationship needs.
Unfollow to protect your peace: If certain accounts trigger insecurity or pressure, it’s okay to mute or unfollow. Your feed should feel good—not like a measuring stick.
Digital Disconnection: “We’re together, but not really”
Picture this: You and your partner are finally home after a long day. You both plop on the couch, scroll through your phones, laugh at a few reels, maybe tag each other—and barely speak. This isn’t about blame. Screens are comforting. But too much digital time can chip away at real connection. What you can do:
Create “phone-free” zones or times: Maybe it’s no phones during dinner, the first 30 minutes in the morning, or 1 night a week that’s tech-free. Start small.
Replace scrolling with shared rituals: Cook dinner together, go for a walk, play a board game, or watch a show together without second-screening.
Ask real questions: “What made you laugh today?” or “What’s something you’re looking forward to this week?” goes a lot further than “Did you see that post?”
The Green Dot Spiral: “Why haven’t they replied?”
You’ve messaged them. It’s been 2 hours. You open the app and see that green dot… they’re online. And now your mind is spiraling. This tiny piece of data—“active now”—can cause massive anxiety. You might start wondering… Are they ignoring me? Who are they talking to? Why are they online but not replying?
What’s really happening? Social media gives us just enough info to get in our heads—but not enough to understand the full picture. What you can do:
Check in with your emotional triggers: If their online status causes anxiety, pause and ask, Is this about the app—or a deeper need for reassurance, trust, or communication?
Communicate your needs calmly: Let them know if certain patterns make you feel unsettled. Not in a blaming way, but with curiosity and openness.
Set notifications aside: Sometimes it’s helpful to mute read receipts or hide online status. It doesn’t solve everything, but it can reduce the unnecessary spiral.
Posting Pressure: “Why don’t you post about me?”
You just posted a photo of you two at brunch. They liked it—but didn’t comment. Meanwhile, they haven’t posted you in months. Oof. Social media can feel like a weird public scoreboard for relationships. And when one person is more private than the other, it can stir up real feelings. What’s really going on? For some, posting = love. For others, posting = performance. If your values around this don’t align, it can cause silent resentment.
What you can do:
Talk about the meaning behind it: Instead of focusing on the post itself, explore what it represents. Does it make you feel loved? Seen? Claimed?
Respect different social media styles: Some people are all over Instagram. Others are barely there. Find a middle ground that feels respectful to both.
Shift the focus inward: Sometimes, the validation we’re seeking from a post is really about needing deeper reassurance offline.
Digital Boundaries: Who, what, and how much?
In 2025, social media has blurred the lines between personal, public, and private. Some real questions couples are facing today… Is it okay to follow your ex? Do we share passwords? What’s considered crossing a line online?
There’s no one-size-fits-all answer. But avoiding these conversations usually leads to assumptions, and assumptions often lead to conflict. What you can do:
Have the conversation—before it’s an issue: Talk about what feels okay and what doesn’t. What are your personal limits? What’s your definition of digital respect?
Review your boundaries regularly: As your relationship evolves, so might your social media comfort zone. Check in every so often.
Agree on conflict etiquette: If you’re upset with each other, maybe don’t jump online and post cryptic quotes or vent in stories. Create a rule that prioritizes privacy and direct communication.
Final Thoughts: Social Media Isn’t the Enemy—Disconnection Is
At its best, social media connects us. It gives us laughs, memories, ideas, and even moments of intimacy. But when it replaces real connection or becomes a tool for comparison, it can quietly create cracks in our relationships. So what’s the goal in 2025?
To use it consciously. With kindness. With boundaries. And with the awareness that real-life love doesn’t need to be curated—it just needs to be cared for.
Feeling like your relationship needs a tune-up?
Sometimes, all it takes is a conversation with someone neutral to sort through what’s real and what’s social media noise.
We’re here to help. Book a session with one of our couples Therapists to help you navigate the online and real-world challenges today!
Book a Session Here or Call us on 0487 933 653
